Especially children.
Sometimes they don’t have the words to describe what they’re feeling.
Sometimes they don’t want attention.
Sometimes they’re afraid that telling someone will make the situation worse.
And sometimes, like my daughter’s friend, they simply don’t want to be the reason everyone else’s afternoon changes.
The Difference Between Curiosity and Concern
The incident also made me think about how adults respond to children’s phones.
There is an important difference between curiosity and legitimate concern.
Curiosity says:
“Who are you texting?”
Concern says:
“You seem upset. Is there something you need help with?”
Curiosity can make a child defensive.
Concern can open a conversation.
Of course, there are situations where adults need to become more involved—particularly if there are credible signs of threats, exploitation, bullying, self-harm, abuse, or another immediate safety issue.
But suspicion alone shouldn’t become an excuse to invade someone’s privacy.
The better starting point is communication.
