I got on a plane to my mother’s hospital and my husband was eleven rows in front of me with my best friend. There was a note of hers in my handbag that she’d written on my fridge that morning.

And I went to see Dev in the November.

I did not go to apologise, although I did. I went because there was one thing I could not go on not knowing.

I asked him what was on the phone.

And he said: “It doesn’t matter now.”

And I said it did, to me.

And Dev Verrall said: “It was a photo, Fran. That’s all. It was one photo and I’d had it for about a fortnight and I’d been working up to it for all of it.”

And then he said the thing that is going to be in me for a long time.